Mother

When your mom has passed it must be so hard to face Mother’s Day. You’re bombarded with TV commercials reminding you to do something you can’t do. When you leave the gift store or garden shop do you think you’ve forgotten to pick up that card or flowering plant? Do people that don’t know you very well ask if you’re spending Sunday with your mother? They don’t know that it’s another painful reminder of your loss and you’ll never get that time back. I have friends and family that lost their mothers. Some of their moms have been gone for decades and others only a few months. Regardless of the time passed, it’s still painful for them. I still have my mother (thank God), but to understand the grief my friends and family members go through I have imagined that day….the day that I won’t be able to pick up the phone and talk to her, the day that I won’t be able to stop at her house and raid her refrigerator for chocolate (she keeps her Hershey Nuggets in the fridge door ), the day when I have pictures to share with her and can’t. There are countless things I take for granted with my mom. Is it taking it for granted when you’re aware of how precious our time together is? I try to remind myself every day that our lives could be changed in the beat of a heart.

My mom and I have asked this question to each other many, many times over many, many years - "What would I do without you?" She seems to think she needs me more than I need her – silly woman. We’ve also had the conversation regarding ‘who goes first’. Of course, my mom should go first. That’s only natural. And as much as it would pain me ( I tear up as I write this), it would pain my mother horribly if I went first. I understand that. Mothers shouldn’t have to bury their children.

I hope you have a mother you can talk to or raid her fridge, or share a moment with. If you don’t – if your mother has passed, you have my deepest sympathies. I mean that – my deepest sympathies. I don’t know if thinking about happier times with your mom will help get through Mother’s Day (or any day), but maybe it will help ease some of the pain knowing you had some joy before the sorrow.

Moms are important and need to be told that often. I think my mom knows that she is so important in my life but just to make sure I’ll tell her again and again as often as our time will let us.

I love you Mom!

Your baby - Cindi